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Tribute | We remember Cathy Black
Submit a tribute for Cathy Black.
Danielle Minneapolis, MN USA 
I dont know where to start with this message but i want to send my deepest condolences to Cathy's family. Im deeply feeling every emotion that Cathy had felt because I also am a victim of the same type of cancer,diagnosed, in sept.2004.the story is not a very nice one but im trying to hang in there. I know that nothing I say can help with the pain of Cathys loss,but we need our strength to move forward and help as many people as we can through this. I havent really found anyone I can talk to about about this because I just put the past behind me and try not to think about it. I was shocked to hear she was feeling exactly the same way...I wish I could have met her.....To whomever reads this,especially her family,, MAY GOD BLESS AND PROTECT US ALL<,,,,, fell free to e-mail me anytime,, and take care everyone... i try not to stay on the computer too long,, it radiates too much electro-magnetic frequencies which are also cancer causing........ ciao ida
My heart and prayers goes out to her family and friends. I know that it has been several years since her passing, but I have had more than one family member pass away from cancer and know that the pain never really goes away. Please accept my heart felt condolences.
It was with the deepest sorrow that I came to the end of her post and learned that Cathy has finished her race. I was all set to write this warm, witty kindred spirit a letter. Now I write here to honor Cathy's memory, to comfort her family and friends with the knowledge that her legacy is powerfully healing, and to thank Cathy herself for creating this "sacred space" where "gynettes" can be together, nurture and encourage one another, and raise awareness and visibility so other women can come out of the darkness and fearful silence and join us. I shared Cathy's perception of this disease and its treatment as an alien abduction. Last August I had a radical hysterectomy and believed that by removing the "spaceship" I had also removed the "alien" and "solved the problem." I thought of myself only in terms of having HAD cancer, not having it. Radiation was to be the extra insurance policy against a return. Two days after Christmas I learned that tumors had continued to grow in the treatment field throughout radiation. Now I have no cervix but I continue to battle cervical cancer (serous papillary adenocarcinoma, stage 1b, grade 3). I will begin chemo this week. In what feels like moments I've gone from thinking of myself as not even having cancer to hearing it can't be cured now but maybe we can control it. Untreated, I'd cross the finish line in less than a year myself. I mean now to run the race set before me with my eyes on the prize. With every step, I honor the brave women to my left and right, those heading for the finish and those approaching the starting line. I truly hope to spend some portion of eternity getting to know Cathy Black better. May we one day compare notes from adjoining lounge chairs adjacent to the dessert table in Heaven (as Anne Lamott so wonderfully pictures it). Until then, I will run my own race in a way I hope will make Cathy proud.
To the Black family: I am sorry for your loss. I can only imagine how much she is missed by you. Just know she didnt lose the race, she just crossed the finish line a winner. May God give you comfort as Cathy as given us with the EOTP group. I know she is looking down on all of us, cheering all of us on to Keep Our Eyes On The Prize as we run the race. May God comfort you as you miss Cathy. Love and Prayers, Lisa Taylor
I am glad that she helped start this website, and I hope that others who are faced with these questions, can find their answers. For those who are just starting down this road, be strong, and all men, please care for your girls and love them always.
Now I am terrified-terrified of spread- secondly I am also afraid I will never be able to carry a child (I am childless at 31 and newly married to a wonderful man). There is nothing I want more in my life than a child. I really wish I could hug Cathy's family and tell them that her story has touched others. I know I will think of her when I am going through my ordeal. God Bless.....
Cathy, you was an angel even before you was born. God had plans for you, He gave you strenght to help others when you was the one with pain. I really hope when I cross the finish line to meet you, I am craying now and I pray for your soul. Thank you for everything, without you I felt lost, now I found you. Thank you, really Aida
Its been a long time, i have since lost my dad as well as 2 babys, but hey i have moved to Cyprus and have a good life so every cloud has a silver lining eh? I know u and Frankie would understand. I just wanted to say hi and thanks again for all the support i have had from this site over the last few years. TC all of u out therexx Jane
I am a day late in submitting this tribute. I really wanted to send it yesterday but ~ well, Cath, you know I’m always late – and I know you always loved me anyway – no surprise, as you always did opt for the unconditional style of love. Besides, I’m hoping you’ll forgive me my tardiness when you hear the reason why I am late in joining all of those who remember you with so much love and appreciation. I was busy into the wee hours of the morning last night, working out the details of an initiative I have been developing for some time now. An initiative, which I realized yesterday (!), has been inspired, assisted and guided by you! And so ~~~ I hereby dedicate “The Goddess Vision Temple” to the memory of Cathy Black, a woman of courage, compassion and vision. You were, and are, a role model to me ~ and to so, so many. Through the gift of your inspiration, you will continue to speak to the goddess in each and every one of us. I am honoured to be a co-creator with you, and with your dear mum, Mae McChesney Black, in this sacred venture. What is the “Goddess Vision Temple”? At the time of this writing, I have only the faintest sketch of the exact form this ‘templar’ will take. Basically, and so far, it presents itself as a two step process: Step 1 ~ to provide a safe place where the goddess can come to rest and restore herself; Step 2 ~ once she is restored to her natural state of perfect (psychic) health, to provide encouragement and support as she realizes her passion in this life. We all have a unique gift to offer to this world, a gift that no-one else can offer in quite the way that we can. It is my belief and conviction that whatever peace we may attain in this life is directly relational to our true understanding of what comprises our unique contribution. Cathy, while you gifted many people in many ways throughout your too-short lifetime, I believe you discovered you had even more amazing gifts to share in the difficult, though illuminating, last act. And share them you did, with a passion and commitment that is rarely seen. As I read in this website the many tributes to your memory, it only strengthens my belief that there are many, like myself, who wish to emulate your wonderful example in whatever time we have left to us here. This “Goddess Vision Temple”, which I dedicate to your memory, is still very young. It is in the ‘gestation’ phase and so, before its ‘birth’, requires much love and quiet nurturance ~ two of the gifts which you and your dear mother possessed in abundance, and which you showered upon me in our brief time together on this side of the finish line. These qualities you both lived and modeled for me, and they inspire and encourage me still. I am deeply grateful to all of the Black family for ‘adopting’ me into your wonderful family so long ago. And, Cathy, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, for being the shining light you are. God bless. With love, Bonnie, Andrew & Michael David xoxoxo ~ oops ~ & Mira - woof! xox
I still marvel when I think about her courage and passion to help others while in the midst of her own living hell. The testaments our family have read that have poured into this site over the years surely illustrate that Cathy and her Founding Sisters are succeeding in their quest: they have a established a home for hundreds of woman seeking answers and dialogue, a safe harbour if you will for women from anywhere in the world who can visit and be welcomed and uplifted. In turn, as a brother I think of Cathy often as do my siblings and families. Her wit, her smile and her compassion could melt a cold heart.She always had a clear understanding of the essence of what mattered, could discern fact from fiction and did not hesitate to convey her feelings. We miss all of these things and more. Thankyou all again on behalf of our families for your warm and kind sentiments these past four years. Meantime, may your eyes win the prize....... david black.
I love you, Cathy, and I regret that we never met. Molly
xoxoxo Shelley
My deepest sympathy to those she leaves behind. Be proud of her. (I know you are). Katy
Love, Kelly
I'm very sorry for your loss! i know how you feel! my mum was brutally murdered 1 1/2 years ago and my dad just died 2 months ago of Lung Cancer. Ive been through alot and im an only child,iam also only 16 years old! my heart goes out to you! please email me sometime.... i'd like it! i dont see many people nowadays so please reply! thanks... my email is tazzie87@hotmail.com
My mother is suffering from Uterine cancer, and my grandmother had ovarian. It's so helpful to read other's stories-- and share information. The doctors only tell you so much. Thank you.
I miss her so much and I think about her often. Recently I signed up for a volunteer program to help educate young children and work with disabled adults in Costa Rica. The first person I thought of was my dear Aunt Cathy..how happy and proud she would have been of me. She has helped so many people and still is with her inspiring story. She certainly encouraged me to try to make a difference in the world! I love and miss u Aunt Cathy! xo, Court
I will never forget the New Years' "grab bag" and that I was the one privileged to get her name (even though she arranged it all). We did have fun with all of that. Andrea T
I miss you so. I love you. that's all I have to say. You remind me of trying to be the best you can be, regardless of what anyone else thinks around you. You still inspire us all,but,then, you know that. Steffj
Thank You Cathy and You will be missed.. though I did know you, I felt like I did after I read your story. I am so sorry... Love Carla
Hi Gramma. Steffi
I'm still fighting this disease,I'm trying hard to stay on top. Everyday I pray to you and wish you were here to talk to. Just reading the stories from your friends and family gives me strength.Please help me through your beautiful spirit to keep going and fighting, Ilove you. I would love to here from anyone who new cathy. Lyn.T
I am sorry to hear of Cathy's death, my heart goes out to the family. I too have lost a loved one to cervical cancer, she was my sister-in-law. She too finished her battle at the age of 23 on May 3, 2002. May God Bless All Of Her Family.
One year ago today, God needed someone to help tend His Garden, and He called our friend Cathy Black. We love and miss you Cathy, Kym, Tom, Boston, Maggie P.S. Keep an eye out for Baillie.
I can't believe that we have nearly reached that 1 year mile stone. I wish that I could have gotten my mum to read the stories on this site BUT it was something she never wanted to do. MUM I sincerely hope that you have now met the infamous Cathy that I used to tell you about and all the others that have since crossed that line to join you. CATHY thank you for all you have done (and I am sure still doing). God bless you all. Jayne
Sencerly.
The few years that I knew and spoke with Cathy and Mitch were enough to know how caring and thoughtful they are! I remember when they first got their dog Smidge. We used to play in their backyard right beside the restaurant. Isn't it funny, the small things you remember about someone? To Mitch and the Black family, my deepst sympathy for the loss of this beautiful person. She touched many, more than what you know!
Claire
Cathy, I remember, always had the knack of making everyone laugh - she had a sharp, active mind and a quick witted humour that always made my mouth curl. As I write this I am reminded of our trip to Buffalo and the "Elvis/lounge lizard" - Mitch will understand! I have a friend here in BC who is also getting close to the finish line. She and Cathy are women I aspire to be like - women with voices and spirit that will go on even after they have left this earth. My friend has been weathering the storm since she was in her early 20's and cancer has been an intermittent visitor. She is now in her early 40's and the visitor has become a permanent resident. I am proud to be her friend just as I am proud and privileged to have known another friend who made an impression on my path in life - Cathy B. My condolences to Mitch and family, Julie Jones
God bless you all - Cathy my mom will finally get to meet you - she finished the race on 20th April 2001. Jayne
Thank you again for all you have done on this website. I am sure it will help so very many people.
Early this afternoon I spoke with Brock, Willa's husband. Brock told me about this website. I've visited the site and have been reading the letters of tribute to Cathy, as well as the other information that's posted on this site. Willa, what a stunning tribute to your sister. And what a fantastic legacy she leaves behind for humanity. I had the honour of meeting Cathy the summer before last. She's the kind of person you don't forget. The first thing she did was to pet our dog Becky. An immediate and beautiful smile, kind words, caring person - that was my first impression - what a lovely, lovely lady. It's wonderful to learn more about Cathy through others' letters. Mitch, Willa, Brock and to all who loved her, Michael and I are so very, very sorry to hear that another Earth Angel has passed away. Cathy's work has touched countless lives and will continue to make a difference in the years to come. God bless you Cathy. Carolyn and Michael Koff
I am Cathy's friend-- what I figure to be about 26 years. We met at high school up in Kirkland Lake and have remained close friends ever since. The trip to Hamilton was such an emotional one. The last time I saw Cathy I had a feeling it would be the last I would see her with my eyes--so I tried to memorized her standing in the doorway. It was so hard to enter that doorway without her standing there saying "Hi Frannie" in that boistrous voice and giving me one of those GREAT BIG HUGS that felt so good. (You see... I only allow about 4 people to call me Frannie and Cathy was one of them.) To see Mitch and the dogs and no Cathy---the reality of her going was heartwrenching... and yet...I was met with an INCREDIBLY BIG HUG from and INCREDIBLY GREAT MAN and I knew it would be o.k. I miss her so much...I thought I had prepared myself... but seeing Mitch, all her family & friends, the pictures and listening to her wonderful tributes made me realize the loss we all must accept. What a Great Gal she was. It was a day to remember and memories of the two of us growing up came flooding in. We shared alot of life events together...my first car accident, our first... tell our moms we're sleeping at each others house then head off to Haileybury to go to a miner's festival for the night, she started my one and only political activity and had me campaign for a liberal candidate (I said ok because he was cute!). We went on our first double date with guys named Marc and Mark ..too funny...we left our mark's alright!! entered a disco dance competition..we lost because our guys couldn't lift us off the floor Ha! Ha! Just lots of great times spent together in the 70's-(endless DONNA SUMMERS)--Life was sooo good!!! We went on to meet WONDERFUL men (who both love sports) and attended each others weddings doing the bridesmaid thing. We've shared stories of our kids (her's are furrier than mine) growing up and all their antics. We had a great trip to Vegas that I will cherish--we had talked so many times that when my kids grew up and left home (her kids will never grow up! Ha) we would be able to go on a trip again....Such a loss..I think that's what I find so unfair--too young and too much of life events still ahead. I never thought we would have to experience one of our deaths so soon. I am so proud of Cathy and all she accomplished in her life and with her latest passion. It was an honour to meet Sue, Lola and Ed. I did keep track of the Web-site and Cathy wrote about her involvement but I had no idea of it's impact... You have changed the world---how amazing!!! I was able to meet some of Cathy's newest friends...she always knew how to pick her friends--the best the world has got!! I hope those of you I spoke to will e-mail me so I can get to know you better too---you have an excellent reference!!! The last time I saw many of you was at Mitch and Cathy's wedding--such a happy time---life is so bittersweet. I believe we are on this earth to experience and embrace all that life has to offer and for those few hours I felt the the full range. It was a celebration of Cathy's life but to lose her now..it's too much. I hope and pray that there will be a cure for this terrible disease because it is robbing us of such precious people. Thank-you Mitch, Willa, David and all of those who helped Cathy through her journey. For those of us who live faraway it was hard to not be able to be there with Cathy as we would have been...I am just so grateful she was surrounded with such love as she so deserved. I just know there is a better place and Cathy is there sharing her wit and cracking up the crowd and laughing--God she has such a great laugh!!! I love you Cathy and I will love you more and more as my time goes on but I will miss you so... Peace I leave with you, MY FRIEND...until that day we meet again.... Frannie P.S. Please write anyone--I'd love to hear from you--it makes me feel closer to her.
I will always remember Cath and Mitch's visit to Pittsburgh. It was such a wonderful adventure. But, then, based on the stories I've heard, anything that Cath was involved in was an adventure! Cath was such an amazing person. May you always feel the embrace of God's arms. You are all in my prayers and thoughts.
God bless Cathy, you are now sitting side by side with the one who cares for us all. Barbara
Jane George our Executive Director called with a gentle reminder and I made a Mad Dash to Wellwood for the meeting. Within minutes Cathy with her quick wit and easy teasing manner moved right into my heart. Dear Friend you will be missed. To Mitch, Cathy's soul mate, To Willa, a very special sister, and to the Black and Lovelock families, God bless you. Time is not measured by the passing of the years, but by what one does, what one feels, and what one achieves (Jawaharlal Nehru) Cathy achieved much.
I only wish I knew you personally!!! I am a new member of Eyes on the Prize. I only wish I was around to have got to know and support you in your race with life!!! Your hard work along with the other gynettes..... will be remembered for a long time the organisation is growing everyday!!! I lighted a purple candle today and said some prayers for you and your dear family!!! Your Family were the lucky ones to have you and to hold you in life and in memory for ever and ever!!!! No one can ever take away the special moments that you shared....treasure them for ever!!! Love and prayers for you and YOUR DEAR FAMILY!!! KarenB NSW AUSTRALIA.
We would like to offer our deepest sympathy on the death of Cathy. June and Bill have kept us posted for a long time on Cathy's conditon, we feel like we have come to know her better through their reports and through her website. We admire her for setting up the website so that other women may benefit from it. We will keep you both in our prayers and may God give you the courage to carry on. Gloria and Dave Allaryce (June's sister and brother-in-law)
Mitch: Without you giving me a chance I would never have had the opportunity to meet Cathy. Thank You.
Jodi
When you first got sick and I called you and I said that I didn't know what to say to you about your situation and you said "why not say life sucks" ! I will never forget the courage you had to reply that way. Cathy, you had a zest for life and you passed that on to others even in sickness. I can learn from your tenacity. Perhaps one of the greatest gifts that God gave you was to be a leader to those who do not have your courage. Thank you for your gift to others. You will watch over us in your special place. Your life has enriched others. Love to you Gay
I was always curious about Cathy and her endeavors because she and I were the same age, both born in 1961, she in Ontario and I in Nova Scotia. Even though we lived in different provinces, we shared many of the same "trials and tribulations" of being young Canadian women during the 80's and 90's. While visiting David and Christine, they would tell me stories about Cathy, her career, her dating adventures, and etc. The way they spoke of her, I always knew that she was very important to everyone in her famiy and that she was held in very high regard. She was the baby of the family but never dismissed as such. As both she and I got older and married, I heard about her wonderful husband "Mitch", her career experiences and her growing role within the family. Over the years my fascination had grown from curiosity into respect. It wasn't until two years ago, that we finally met face to face, and it was inevitable that I would feel as though I already knew her. When we first met each other, I had this strange, overwhelming feeling of being very proud of her. It was obvious to me that she was exactly the way she had always been described...no embellishments here. Intelligent, well-spoken, strong, passionate, witty, full of life, energetic, tenacious, well turned out, fearless and obviously very able. I instantly felt proud of her for developing into such a strong, self-assured and wonderful woman. I remember thinking to myself, "Cathy is so vibrant and she embodies so much wisdom and strength for a thirty something woman. It is no wonder that everyone in her life treats her with such respect"......... I will miss her! To Mitch and the Black family, I would like to extend my deepest sympathies to all of you. My love and prayers are with you.
I only got to see Cathy and her husband Mitch every once in a while, but I always loved those visits. Cathy had the best, hearty laugh. I loved it when she and Mitch would go back and forth with their hilarious stories of different people and places. One time they even hosted 15 of my friends camping out in small chalet at New Year's! And, this was a two bedroom condo!! One thing that I found the most incredible about her was her amazing sense of humor - she even used laughter during her horrible ordeal with cancer. Cathy didn't want her family to feel sorry for her so she'd use humor to deflect her pain, and to make us all feel more comfortable with it. Even, in her suffering, she thought of others. Cathy Black has left us an incredible legacy. She took her tragedy and turned her hopelessness, and frustration into a postive force: This website I'm writing to right now. Eyes on the Prize, a virtual on-line support group for women living with gynecologic cancers. Isn't that incredible? Thanks to her work and the work of other giving women, I'm able to voice my love for her through this amazing on-line community. I don't think she knew this, but I'm telling her now, and I think she can hear me, She was my hero. I know I'm not alone in those sentiments.
Love Joyce & Ross
I just want to extend my deepest sympathies to all of you. I am a new member of EOTP but knew of it through my sister, Marcy, who had belonged to the group before she too "finished the race" this past March. EOTP had brought her, and now me, a lot of support and comfort. My heart goes out to all of you for the tremendous loss you are now experiencing. Please know how much Cathy is loved and appreciated for all she did to help join these wonderful, strong and brave ladies together. I wish you peace and comfort in the difficult days ahead and may the love of all those whose lives Cathy has touched surround you and bring healing to the hurt you all feel at this difficult time. Sincerely, Michele S.
Cathy has touched many people in her short time here and we all are the better for it. Alyson
you are missed
My condolences to Cathy's family during this very difficult time.
THE GREATEST MOMENT WAS WHEN SHE HELPED ME LOCATE MY MOTHER IN TURKEY, WHEN ISTANBUL WAS STRUCK WITH AN EARTHQUAKE. I REMEMBER THE WARM HUG SHE GAVE ME AND SAID EVERTHING WILL BE OKAY, AND WE BOTH HAD TEARS IN OUR EYES FOR HAPPINESS OF FINDING MY MOM WELL AND SAFE. I PRAYED FOR CATHY THAT NIGHT, THIS WORLD HAS BEEN A BETTER PLACE, FOR HAVING HAD CATHY IN IT AND HOW LUCKY WE ALL ARE, THAT CATHY TOUCHED US ALL IN MANY WAYS WITH WARMTH, AND A HEART OF GOLD. MY CONDOLENCES TO MITCH AND FAMILY
It was an honour to know and work with Cathy. Her outlook on life and the way she made everyone feel so comfortable while talking to her were just a couple of the things I will always remember about such an amazing woman. She has touched my heart in a way not many people can. If I could choose a guardian angel for my baby, the choice would be easy. My thoughts are with you Mitch and all of Cathy's family and friends. She has touched us all deeply. Jennene
As time went by I would hear how she was researching and giving endlessly of herself to find a happy ending to this nasty disease. I have read the tributes and can see her efforts were not in vain. To Mitch, I hope her strength will help you through this tough time. Willa and Catherine, your tireless efforts must be fueled by the love you shared in your lifetime for a pretty amazing sister/aunt. I know there are many special memories that will lift you up whenever you feel sad. With heartfelt condolences
Our deepest sympathy to Mitch and family. Our thoughts are with you. Love, Dana & Keith
My condolences to the family of Cathy Black, it was a pleasure to know and work with a fun-loving, dynamic woman. Jane
"God needed a flower for his bouquet, so he went to his garden and chose the most beautiful one". All my love to the Black's, Brandi
Following is a poem I came across years ago, for those left behind: POEM FOR THE LIVING When I am dead Pray for me a little, Think of me sometimes, But not too much. It is not good for you To allow your thoughts to dwell Too long on the dead. Think of me now and again As I was in life At some moment which is pleasant to recall, But not for long. Leave me in peace As I shall leave you, too in peace. While you live, Let your thoughts be with the living. MARGUERITE RENAUD
Cathy Black was my friend too, and I was blessed to know her in all her face-to-face glory... to look into those dancing eyes and vibrant smile, to be enveloped in one of her warm and generous hugs, and to share a sisterhood with her... as did so many of you who have written so eloquently, and as did so many of you who are reading these tributes but can't find the words to express what is in your heart. After two days of searching for the words, I too am struggling with having so much to say yet not knowing how. We connected (as she so often did with the women she met) immediately...same profession (PR), same sense of humour, same sense of fun and mischief, same hair colour (natural blondes, of course), shared passion to support and advocate for women living with gynecological cancer. Hers is a beautiful legacy. She was so proud of her "on-line family", of EOTP, of Mitch and her "real-time" family, her friends, of the discussion group she started here at Wellwood. She had so much left to do here, in this life. Canadian author (and fabulous woman) Margaret Laurence wrote that "Life and work and friendship and love will go on, in others, your inheritors." The last thing Cathy said to me (before the "I love you") was that she would always be with me as we continue our work. I watch the cardinals building a nest in my back yard, and look at the daffodils blooming, and the sun beaming, and the wind dancing in the trees and I want her to know "We are your inheritors Cath. We will all continue to walk together with you on this 'glorious quest'." I am so grateful for the life and love of my friend, so glad that she was loved so deeply and by so many and especially that she had Mitch in her life. Despite so much suffering and sadness, she said she was so blessed. K. Jane George Wellwood Resource Centre of Hamilton
I thank God everyday for bringing the two of us together. We met on a cervical cancer message board. I was about one year out of treatment and Cath was just beginning her journey. She was searching for information and others she could relate to. I had mentioned another email support group I was involved with and she immediately wrote me asking about it. Of course, I sent her there and it was the start of an incredible friendship between the gynettes. The organization, Eyesontheprize, was soon started out of that friendship and love we had for each other. Cathy was always the first one to encourage someone or ask how they were. She genuinely cared about people and understood their fears. She never put herself first. She never complained. Cathy was famous for sending private posts to each of us. I think most of us have saved them all. I remember when my daughter first went off to college. I had a difficult time dealing with it and she told me everything I should expect that first year. I refered back to that post often and she was right on the mark! I continue reading her posts to this day and still am comforted by them. When my husband became ill very suddenly last year, Cath called me to see how we were doing. Imagine that! She wanted to know how we were doing, it didn't matter what she was dealing with. I sure will miss her. I am very grateful that I did have the privilege of meeting Cathy when she and Mitch were in Pittsburgh. Her eyes really do sparkle with love. She made a point to sit and talk to me. She knew how to make you feel special. I felt as if I had known her all my life. How I wish that were true. And, yes, I'm the one who sent all the cards in the envelopes covered with stickers. Cath teased me about it whenever she had the chance. Thanks for sharing Cathy with us, Mitch. I will be forever grateful for having met her. Thanks, too, for taking such good care of her. It must have been so difficult for you all to see her suffer. She is at peace now. I'd like to send my love to you, Mitch, and the rest of Cath's family. She was a very beautiful person and will continue to have a special place in my heart. She will be missed so much, but her work will live on. It's because of Cathy that other women will have a safe place to find support. I love you Cath! With love, Sue Bates
She was such a wonderful person..I still can't quite believe she is gone but I know her spirit is here, I can feel it. I remember one of the last conversations I had with Aunt Cathy on the phone a little while ago. We were talking about relationships and how lucky she was that she met my Uncle Mitch. She told me it was the most amazing feeling, finding the right person and she reassured me that I would find the same thing one day. For anyone who saw my Aunt and Uncle together, you would know what I mean. I am so proud of what Aunt Cathy has accomplished with Eyes on the Prize. The fact that she wanted to do something to help other people, just says so much about a person. Not once did she feel sorry for herself and in fact whenever I tried to ask her how she was feeling she always changed the subject to find out what was going on in my life. I could go on and on about all of the times she made me laugh and the great advice she gave me about life. I will take that with me forever. Although I miss her deeply, I am glad she is no longer in pain. I feel better knowing that she is now with my grandmother and grandfather and is not alone. I love you Aunt Cathy!
To Cathy's spirit I send my thanks for your support, your courage, your compassion, and your generosity. In working with others to set up EOTP, you established a place where women could meet to share their fears, their sadness, their knowledge and their joy. You let me know that I was not alone and you inspired me to be a better person. With hope and with love. Jean
I will burn a candle in her memory tonight. I also will light a luminarie in her memory when I participate in the Relay for Life on June 9th. I love you, Cathy Black. God bless you and your family. You blessed my life. Thank you. Cheryl
Cathy and I spoke frankly of living and dying. We agreed that life was mysterious and after life more mysterious still - a mystery we called Spirit. We agreed that death itself is simply the absence of life - a condition of no-thing. Cathy is no-thing now. By that I mean she is fully spirit. No longer framed by matter, she has joined the rush and whirl of universal energy in its wildest dance. And so will we all. I learned long ago that it is difficult to be a materialist in an immaterial world. Had we all the chance to don an electron microscope and look closely at our own hands we would see that self-same rushing and whirling of universal energy as our fingertips de-materialized before our very eyes. At the bottom of it all it is always and only spirit. Our understanding of this is limited. We can only look on in awe. And so what looks solid looks so only at one scale of things. When we look more closely it all dissolves. The Hindus have a name for this. Maya - Illusion. The Aborigines call waking life a dream and dreams Waking Life. The North and South American Indians regularly visit the spirit world to bring wisdom back to this grosser plane. Humans have always known that we live in a universe of infinite surprise, of shifting borders, of awe-some mystery. Cathy knew these things in her bones. Though I've met few people more capable of materializing their dreams in what we call reality - witness Cathy's co-founding of EyesOnThePrize.Org! - she was well aware that there is more to this than meets the eye. I found a sisterhood with her in that knowing. I'm glad we had the chance to share our sense of what we each sometimes called the divine. To Mitch, her siblings, friends and family - you've had the larger part of it, both the loving and the hurting. You got to hold and hug the physical Cathy. To love her fully! I count you lucky for that, and heartbroken to lose her. I know. It feels like a crack in the cosmic egg. It feels like the heart is irretrievably shattered. And the world can feel cruel for being able to live on…. But that's the dance we do, we humans. We are upon Shakespeare's stage all strut and glory, then we exit stage left. So it's been for all our ancestors, so it is for Cathy, so it will be for you and me; and then our children's children. Beyond the good we do here lies mystery. Cathy Black did good here. May she waltz with the stars and play hopscotch with the comets as she continues her journey. I am quite sure she will do good there as well.
What would Cathy want us to do? Carry on her work, her enthusiasm and joy for life. There are ways to help others, always. What a truly incredible person Cathy was. She does live on.
While most of our conversations took place via email, I had the good fortune to meet Cath in the flesh twice. In January, 2000, we met briefly during a conference for gyn cancer survivors in Palm Desert, CA. And later, in August, my husband and I breakfasted with Cath and Mitch in Williamsville, NY. Although we had a chance to visit for over an hour, and I ate more pancakes than I ever thought possible, I left hungry for more time with her. Although I felt I had known her forever (all of you who have met her in person know what I mean), these visits were far too short. I can only hope that in some future somewhere we will be able to sit and talk as long as we want. I learned so much about giving from Cath. This wise and kind woman, in the midst of all her troubles, took the time to comfort me when I fretted about the ambiguous result of yet another ct scan, a strange symptom, or just general life problems. Although there were many of us in her circle of friends, she had the rare ability to make each of us feel special. One of my first memories of Cath was her comment that she never had been a joiner, how she never had the need to reach out to other women, and how all that changed when she got cancer. And what a profound change it was, one that has already helped many women stricken with gyn cancers, and will undoubtedly help countless more. Cath's last spoken words to me were an offer to help with an EOTP project I was struggling with. How typical of Cath! I pray that I can carry out the lessons she taught me. I'll miss you, dear Gynette. And to Mitch and all of Cath's family and friends in Hamilton, I send you my love and prayers. I certainly don't have to tell you how special Cath was. I'm so sorry that she's gone. Love, Katie eyesontheprize.org
I LOVE YOU MY FRIEND. KYM
My heart goes out to you and all of your and Cath's family members today. Cathy was, and is, an incredible blessing. I'm so grateful that you and Cath had a chance to come to the Donley B&B last September. I'll never go out on my front porch again without seeing Cath sitting there -- face aglow and eyes sparkling -- watching the antics of the praying mantis, who seemed to think we had all gathered just to watch him perform. I've found that what God gives in small doses, He gives in concentrated form. Though our visit was short, we shared love to last a lifetime, though Cath's life here on earth was short, she brought enough love and joy to last us the rest of our lives. I'll never forget her. She rests in my heart right next to my own Cathy, who also ran this earthly Race in short order and sprinted victoriously over the finish line into the hands of God. I know she was among those waiting to greet her namesake when Cath crossed over the line yesterday. And it can not be left unsaid, Mitch -- what an incredibly special person you are!!!!! You have truly given of your self over and over these past months as you have stayed by Cath's side during the last lap of her Race. I know it wasn't easy, but that you have been greatly blessed in your sacrifice. God has great things ahead for you as you continue on the course He has laid out for you. I'll be cheering for you on the sidelines! Yell out if you need help! Love and hugs, Moose
Cathy and I became close during the time when she had experienced recurrence and I was dealing with the terminal diagnosis of our daughter Alison. We exchanged many notes, but even through the daily dreariness of living with cancer, we also found a lot of other ways to know each other (love of animals, nature, and life itself). Because I knew Cathy beyond EOTP, here is what I wish for her. I wish Cathy a safe flight over the rainbow.....a walk in an eternal garden where the flowers are always blooming and fragrant......the chance to sing with the birds and float with the butterflies.......nature's creatures on her lap and in her arms.....and the peace which passeth all understanding........... Although it might seem her mission on earth was left unfinished, it will live on in all who take on the "impossible dream"...the fight for gyn cancer awareness, and hopefully not so impossible. And, finally, to her devoted Mitch.......you gave her the greatest gift of all....... your love. May you also be at peace. Love, Georgia
Yet *another* example of Cathy's generosity of spirit came to light recently through one of the newer Canadian members of EyesOnThePrize.org's very international email support group, who had been referred to the listserv by Cathy last winter. In typical "Cath-ness", our gal had still continued reaching out to women even though her own medical challenges continued to grow. I am very sorry that I never got to meet Cathy in person. I "met" Cathy exactly two years ago (strangely enough). Our friendship grew mostly through email, with just a few phone calls thrown in. Being the minority Canadians among the EOTP founders, Cath and I have had lots of fun ribbing our gynette sisters south of the border. Talk about the mouse roaring at the elephant! I was drawn to her sparkling personality and her wry sense of humour. She had a keen sense of the ridiculous, wrapped up in the kindest of souls. Behind her infectious giggle and lilting voice lay a perceptiveness few people possess. When something made her angry, she got to work to change it. She didn't mince words. She spoke her mind, but was never mean. I think she must have *always* had a twinkle in her eye. Cathy, you will be missed so much! It has been such an honour ("with a u", eh!) to walk alongside you for just a short while on your journey. Mitch, Willa, Bruce, Murray, David and all of Cath's family - thank you for loving and caring for Cathy so well during her life. In any family anecdotes she told me, it was obvious how much she loved you all and was loved back. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Love, Karen
I am so very sorry about your loss. I hope you will find some comfort in knowing that Cathy touched the lives of so many women who are fighting the fight she fought so bravely. I joined the group around the time Cathy began posting less frequently. However, so many times I would search through the archives for words of wisdom...words that touched me and made sense to me...so often those words belonged to Cathy. Cathy touched all who were privileged to know her, but she will also touch the lives of those who walk this path after her. She is a special person who will be remembered for her wisdom, her sense of caring and her giving nature. May God Bless Cathy and Your Family.
I'll miss you Cathy! Your boundless energy and optimism lives on in those whose hearts you touched. You are a true hero. I hope you have found peace.
I was blessed last year with the opportunity to visit with Cath and Mitch -- in June at their home and in September at mine. What a treat it was to see those warm, dancing eyes animate the words I was accustomed to reading in an email message! I will treasure those brief times forever. Cathy used her quick wit to put people instantly at ease, not to hold them at a distance. She never shied from saying "I love you," and was quick to offer heartfelt praise and to reach out in comfort. Passionate in her determination to make things better for women who came after her, she worked hard to make EyesOnThePrize.org her legacy. I was proud to help her realize her legacy before she died. I promise you, Mitch and family, that we won't let up our efforts to keep Cathy's dream alive and move it forward until no woman has to suffer gyn cancer alone. I hope we'll see the day that no one has to suffer gyn cancer at all. Cathy, I will miss you terribly, but through my tears, I rejoice in the image of you bursting over the Finish Line, finally free of the body that cancer made so painful. I love you and know I will see you again, when you will be on the other side of the Finish cheering me on. Godspeed, my beloved friend -- you are one gal who really kept your eyes on the prize! Thank you, Mitch, for sharing your precious Cathy with us and for caring for her so devotedly. I'm praying that God will comfort you and the rest of your family with wonderful memories to replace the images of these last months of suffering. Love, Sue Donley EOTP.org
My tears today are only a small glimpse of what I feel in my heart which now is full of sorrow. I hope your entire family will feel the love I am sending your way. I knew this day would come, but in all honesty I resisted it with all my heart, mind and soul. Nevertheless, it has arrived. I cannot say that I am sure if Cath ever really understood how many lives she touched and how much I truly loved her. In her words towards me she said: In a message dated 8/4/2000 8:47:36 AM,cblack...writes: << I have to tell you how really wonderful you are and how very lucky I am to have you in my life...if only in a 'virtual' capacity. You just never cease to amaze me with your spiritual evolution and perspective. You must be an 'old soul' Lola, and you are here to teach the rest of us how to truly love one another.>> I was the lucky one. Cath taught me much more than I ever felt I was able to give back to her. Her encouragement and zeal were contagious and compelling. I considered her my dear friend, a kindred spirit, that is forever etched deep within my soul. I will miss her more than words can say. I love you Mitch and am holding you near with my whole heart. Good-bye Cath, my sweet friend. Love, Lola Bogue co-founder EOTP.org
My thoughts and prayers are with the family and friends of this very special woman. I hope you take comfort in knowing how many of us Cathy helped and how much we love her. With love, Marian
Cathy was one of the first people to respond to one of my very first postings on EOTP. She had a way about her, both in writing and in person, that was uniquely warm, empathetic, cheerful, and sensitive-even in the face of her own crushing battle. May each of us hold a little of Cathy's spirit in our hearts to remind us of the kind of human being we would all so very much like to be. My mom, Margaret, my husband Larry, and I will miss her. Thank you Cathy, for being so much of the inspiration behind this site. So many women to follow. You've been a wonderful example for all of us. Carol F., Margaret R. and husband Larry Pittsburgh, PA
Cathy was a dynamic part of this community and one of the founders of EyesOnThePrize.org. You'll see "Cathy B." throughout the site and hear her voice full of humor, warmth, and compassion. The fact that EOTP is here and that you know about it, is in large part due to Cath's monumental efforts to help build this site, promote it in the press, and found a nonprofit organization to see that its work continues. She was our original PR person -- through multiple bouts of radiation and chemo and news of advancing disease -- and continued on our Board even after her illness kept her from doing day-to-day tasks. This site and organization has her stamp all over it and her spirit woven through it. You can read her story at: http://www.eyesontheprize.org/story/cath.html Cathy also started a gyn cancer support group at the Wellwood Cancer Resource Centre in her hometown of Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. A great believer in on-the-ground support groups, as well as the virtual support of EyesOnThePrize.org, Cathy wanted our EOTP site to be a hub to help women find support groups in their local communities. We rushed this function of our web-site on the fast-track so Cathy could see it before she died, though we are still filling the database: http://www.eyesontheprize.org/advocacy/community.html Cathy called Sue D. last week when she was having a "good day" and through her told us how thrilled she was with the progress we had made on the site and on getting the word out about EyesOnThePrize.org. She was so proud to be a part of this important effort. We were reminded of the song that inspired her throughout her cancer journey, "The Impossible Dream" from the Man of La Mancha: To right the unrightable wrong; To love pure and chaste from afar; To try when your arms are too weary; To reach the unreachable star! This is my quest, to follow that star, No matter how hopeless, no matter how far. To fight for the right, without question or pause; To be willing to march into hell for a heavenly cause. And I know, if I'll only be true to the glorious quest, That my heart will lie peaceful and calm When I'm laid to my rest. And the world will be better for this, that one woman scorned and covered with scars Still strove with her last ounce of courage, To reach the unreachable star! Throughout her treatment Cathy devoted all the time and strength she could muster to launching the EyesOnThePrize.org site and nonprofit, always with a keen sense of humor and loving voice. And the world *is* better for this... "that one woman, torn and covered with scars, still strove with her last ounce of courage..." Her "impossible dream" was that no woman should ever have to walk through the nightmare of gynecologic cancer alone. We at EyesOnThePrize.org are determined that that through our organization and its web community, Cathy's dream of universal support for gyn cancers will not be an "impossible dream." Until there is a cure for these cancers, we intend to honor her by being here for every woman who hears those dreaded words, "It's cancer." Her quest will not be in vain. All of us "gynettes" behind the scenes at EOTP knew that Cath was nearing the end of her race in this life these last few months. Still today we are devastated and are mourning her loss. It is inconceivable to accept fully that she is gone. She so warmly held each of us and everyone at EOTP close to her heart in a special and unique way. We will do our best to make her proud by keeping our weeping eyes on the prize in the face of such a crushing loss. With much love for her and for all of you, The "Gynettes": Sue D., Lola, Katie, Sue B., Karen, Jackie, and Georgia Submit a tribute for Cathy Black. Contribute a donation to Eyes on the Prize in memory of Cathy Black. |
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Danielle from Minneapolis